I Should Be Folding Laundry

Idol Chat with Adam & Beth | The Final

May 15th, 2013

Adam: It’s hard to believe it has been a year since Philip Philips rocked our pajamas off with “Home,” but it has. It feels like it’s been almost that long since our last Idol Chat. Are you ready for this business, baby? I mean Beth?

I think I’m ready. I’ve got my pajamas buttoned up tight and a nice tall drink. Let’s do this.

Adam: Okay, so Kree started it off with a little Sarah McLachlan, minus the sad images of abandoned puppies. More like Sarah McROCKlan, because Kree rocked that puppy. Understated, for once. That really kind of kicked ass. Great way to start for Kree, I say.

It’s interesting to me that you liked it because I felt it was a bit boring and by a bit I mean A LOT. I’m also interested in what the judges have to say about it except not really. Adam, don’t tell anyone I said this but I think Nikki looks pretty tonight. shhh….

Candice is singing “Chasing Pavement.” I love that she has that Jill Scott vibe when she sings, her voice is just incredible but I was not blown away, by any means. Although, her boots? THEY FANCY.

Adam: But I’m not sure they were made for walking. Anyway, I’m just so disappointed that we’re at my floor. I hate to step off this elevator. Its music is oh so pretty. Oh, wait . . . that was Candice? Oh. Hmm. Okay. Also, Mariah. Beyond what, you raving pile of done?

Adam: In the second round, Kree hit us with “All Cried Out,” which I believe is an original song. I won’t comment on the song itself other than to say that it seemed to expose the weaknesses in Kree’s voice, even though I actually liked the way she expressed herself vocally. Other than the whole, you know, pitch thing.

You are a smart, smart fellow. I could not agree more. Maybe her ears were broken? Or maybe OUR ears are broken? Either way. I need ice cream.

Candice is singing “I am beautiful.” I think it’s so unfair to Kree and Candice that the best original song EVER went to Phillip Phillips last year. Too bad for them. I didn’t hate that song but I did not fall in love with it.

Adam: I agree, and I kind of think they should have abandoned the original song category this time based on that premise. Too much to live up to. This was a complete yawner. I guess the performance was fine. I’ve already forgotten it.

On to Kree III. She’s singing a Patty Griffin song, which is always a good choice, even when not in the shower. It was good. Not great. I really really really love the song, and I only really really liked the performance. Still. Very nice. I don’t know if it’s championship-quality, but it was nice.

I agree with you AND Randy. It was very nice and definitely her best performance of the night. But I’m not sure that’s saying too much.

Candice is performing “I Have Nothing,”now here’s a performance that actually grabbed my attention. Even the Coke-inspired stage graphics didn’t annoy me because I enjoyed this performance so much. Well done. Great way to end the show.

Adam: That? Was the sound of winning.

Hi friends

April 30th, 2013

I just wanted to pop in and let you know that Blogher is doing a Mother’s Day series and they’re syndicating the letter to Moms I wrote a few weeks back – check it out, along with the others, if you’d like!

And here’s a cutie photo of my babies I took last month. I’m still around, working, being a Mom, taking a photos…

Oh AND I posted on my BFP blog about a labor and almost-delivery that I photographed in the fall.

OH OH OH and Clara is a toddler.

Idol Chat with Adam & Beth | Final Four

April 24th, 2013

Adam: Beth, it’s starting to get serious here. Four finalists. Four judges. Four hours of introductory videos and Ryan Seacrest talking. Are you ready for this quadruple craziness?

I’m so excited for this show that I drank four times as much alcohol just to get me through.

Adam: Amber is starting us off with The Power of Love, which wasn’t slow and dramatic enough when Celine Dion originally sang it, apparently. Vocally, it was pretty great. But I hope I never have to listen to it again.

And Keith Urban sounds like the fifth Wiggle.

I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m going to listen to it four more times. Not because it was so great but because I keep falling asleep. (also, notice the number four appearing. AGAIN.)

How can I not say anything about Candice’s earrings? They are BY FAR the largest things I’ve ever seen in my life. Notice I did not say the largest earrings. THE LARGEST THINGS EVER. She’s performing a song I’ve never heard before which is fine except it wasn’t super catchy to me. She sounded good but this performance was nothing special.

Adam: Candice appears to have discovered what I didn’t know: that the hottest thing in America right now is smooth jazz. I’m so excited to know this now.

Kree is about to sing “It Hurts So Bad,” and I really hope that’s not supposed to be some kind of warning to my ears. I also have to mention Kree totally missed the memo about the giant, scene-stealing earrings, instead opting for leather pants. Um. I’m not sure that was wise. Oh, and she sang. I didn’t really feel it.

I agree with you. Boring. Red shirt. Black pants. Regular-sized earrings. Blah performance. Now we have to suffer through Mariah speaking. This is the worst night ever.

Angie’s performance…hmmm…I was all excited to talk about All the Teeth but then her performance confused me. I kinda really liked it and I sorta hated it. I don’t know, Adam. You tell me what I thought about that performance. I’m begging you.

Adam: I’ll tell you, Beth . . .

Wait for it . . .

Angie is Colton Dixon. That is why we hate that shit.

While the duets are going on, I just want to say that the three non-Randy judges have a remarkable knack for taking turns making love to the camera. It’s obscene. And hilarious. They’re such attention whores. Randy’s too cool for that scene. That’s all.

Speaking of Randy being cool, he looks very Arthur Fonzarelli tonight with his low cut shirt. I think I saw a chest hair. Yes, just one.

Adam: Oh, Amber. No. I can’t talk to you. Beth? Can you do me a favor? If one of the judges calls this performance “current,” will you use some weapon to kill me right now? Something current, like a mace, an arrowhead, or a catapult? Dear lord, why am I not dead already?

Oh, crap. Randy said she was current, I have to go grab my arrowhead. It was nice knowing you, Adam. That performance was not enjoyable for me at all. Especially her shoesbootssandals.

So, Candice is singing Emotion. First, well, forget it, I can’t be clever. She sounded good but again, I wasn’t blown away. Not even an inch away.

Adam: It sucked. It shouldn’t have happened in nineteen-seventy-never, and it shouldn’t have happened today. Oh, and you know that thing where you watch a DVD and forget to press the stop button and there’s some awful sound at the end of the credits? Mariah talking is that. The cue that I forgot to press the skip button.

Kree is singing A Tireder Shade of Bored. Even her diamond shoes were boring. Blah. It was so blah. When was this song a hit? What was wrong with you when this song qualified as a hit, America? I give up. I have no hope for this season.

Oh man. This song hurt my head and probably my ears. I’m sad because I like Kree but she was so disappointing and just so just top 10 this week, not final four.

Angie is singing Cry Me a River. Adam, there has been a LOT of (p)leather on this show tonight. And also tears. Mine. And yours. Tonight’s show was not good. I’m wondering if anyone will agree with us tonight? Or are we just grouchy old men who should be in bed by 7pm?

Adam: No, we’re not grouchy old men. If we were grouchy old men, we may have looked up with glee from our shuffleboard match at the dulcet tones of OLD FART NIGHT.

That’s all for tonight. Join us next week when we take a shot of tequila for every time someone wears large earrings, wears pleather and #INITTOWINIT appears on the screen.

Who’s going home?

Adam: Kree
Beth: Kree

The Vintage Pearl | Winners announced!

April 23rd, 2013

I am so excited to announce the winners to The Vintage Pearl giveaway. I loooved so many of your selections. First, I wanted to share with you my choice. Erin asked me to choose any piece and, as you can imagine, it was not an easy choice, however, I knew I wanted a new ring so once I saw this, I just knew.

When it arrived and fit so perfectly, my heart felt so very happy. It’s amazing how a simple piece of jewelry can feel so good in your heart…

Except, it’s more than that. When you can personalize something, the power it holds is truly unbelievable. It really is the perfect gift.

Now onto the lucky winners:

Congratulations! The winners have been contacted and should check your email!

Thanks again to The Vintage Pearl for a sweet giveaway.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Idol Chat with Adam & Beth | Top 5

April 17th, 2013

Adam: Well, I’m feeling a little out of place here in Week 2 (this season just started last week, yes?), because the top five is all female. For some reason that makes a difference. But I’ll man up, or girl up, or . . . I don’t know. I’ll just enjoy the show. Beth, are you ready for a diva battle?

Beth: hmmm…I can see where you’re coming from. Now, when you say diva battle, you mean between Mariah and Randy, right? The thing about singing songs from the year the contestants were born is that HOLY CRAP WE ARE OLD.

Adam: Um . . . I meant between the two of us, but whatevs. I will say that Keith Urban gives us absolutely nothing to make fun of with his wardrobe. T-shirt. Jeans. Okay. It was nice of the rest of the judges to dress as extras from the “Beat It” video. Anyway. Candice.

Straight Up? Definitely a wise choice if for no other reason than that she won’t have to worry about being unfavorably compared to the original vocal (Oh, Paula, may you rest in peace). But I really wish Simon were here to call that performance cabaret. I really liked it, but it still seemed pretty safe for Top 5 territory.

Beth: I miss Simon. Thanks for bringing him up, now I’m crying. I enjoyed the performance but wasn’t blown away.

Janelle is singing a song by Vince Gill because when she was little it would stop her from crying but yeah, you guessed it, IT HAS THE OPPOSITE EFFECT ON ME. Boring. Pitchy. Sucky. Just NO. Hey, while we are on the subject of NO, what is going on with Nikki’s boobs, Adam?

Adam: Nikki’s boobs? Hmm . . . I hadn’t noticed over the screech of her voice and the roar of my own snoring. All I can say is Janelle’s song choice was out of her range (on the low end) and her dress choice was straight out of Barbara Mandrell’s wardrobe. Also, Mariah is still talking. This is the best sleep I’ve gotten in months.

Kree is up next singing “She Talks to Angels” by the Black Crowes, which is one of my favorite songs to sing. She did such a nice job. Nice. A little too nice. It’s supposed to be southern fried rock, and I’m pretty sure that was grilled and healthy and not exactly my cup of beer. I’m a touch disappointed with that one.

Beth: Beer. That’s what I need. I really enjoyed the beginning with just the guitar, to be honest. Too bad it only lasted 24 seconds. The song didn’t hold my attention but what DID hold my attention was the cat fight at the end between Nikki and Mariah.

Angie is performing “I’ll Stand by You” and well, I don’t know. I certainly didn’t hate it but I would never buy that single. Or listen to it for free off of Spotify. I LOVE that the three judges were giving standing ovations and Nikki did not. Dangit, I enjoy Nikki. Adam, what is Mariah always reading when she’s talking? And why is she always talking?

Adam: Mariah is reading War and Peace. Word for word. Without a break. And Nikki can’t stand up because her Coke cup is the only thing covering up the rest of her boobs. Angie overperformed that song almost as much as she overpronounces her T’s.

I can’t believe the show is already done! Amber wraps things up with a song from the year she was born. I’m guessing it will be Call Me, Maybe. No? She’s older than that? Oh, no, she’s choosing a Mariah song to remind her that she’s old. Smart, Amber. Smart. Also, my ears are bleeding.

I would like to take a moment to discuss Amber’s outfit which is a giant “no.” It’s just bad. Is she wearing a sunset? The song started bad, like her shoes but it ended better than I expected. And listen, this is a hard song to sing. I sing it often in the shower and my neighbors always, always complain. Trust me. It’s tricky.

Candice is singing a Whitney and Mariah duet (which I didn’t know existed) for the diva round. Adam, I don’t like divas. Candice is a great performer, I have a hard time believing she won’t win the whole thing but I didn’t LOVE that song OR that performance. Call me crazy.

Adam: Girl, you crazy. Here’s the thing: I remember wanting to love this song when it came out. And I didn’t. I sarcastically said when I heard Candice say she was taking on Mariah and Whitney that I was sure she would do a better job than they did. And then she went and did it. And I loved that. I don’t know. It really connected with me.

Janelle is singing Dumb Blond by Dolly Parton, and, shocked as I am, I love the spirit of this performance. It was fun, but she forced me to take her seriously as an artist. Or at least I obliged on this occasion. I’d vote for that.

Grab some Pabst Blue Ribbon, some peanuts and lets head to the local tavern for some Karaoke. YEEEHAWWW. I did not like this performance. I thought she was so pitchy. Dumb blonde needs to go. K?

Kree performed a Celine Dion song. She sounded good but MEH. But don’t blame Kree, I’m grouchy and tired and why aren’t I sleeping?

Adam: I blame Kree. It was annoying and gross. She needs to stop shaking her head.

If I could be a diva, I’d be Beyonce. Oh, who am I kidding? I kind of am Beyonce. I can’t believe Angie didn’t pick Miley Cyrus. She did okay. Smart choice picking a song without a lot of T’s in it.

So, this was DEFINITELY my favorite Angie performance so far this season. (and by this season I mean these past two weeks). The only thing I did not enjoy was the Bohemian Rhapsody Angie heads floating around in the beginning. That was just creepy.

Amber is performing a very sleepy Barbra Streisand song, let me just grab my blankie and pillow and turn over and go to sleep. I’m not saying Amber didn’t perform that beautifully, because she did, I’m just saying I don’t see that as a top ten any time soon. I’m afraid it’s going to be lost on most of the viewers.

Adam: I really thought it was outstanding. It’s a fine way to exit the show, which I’m afraid she will. But still, she should be proud of that one.