Tomorrow should mark the day I turn nine weeks pregnant.
Instead, yesterday we learned that we lost the heartbeat we saw last week .
I know you didn’t even know about this pregnancy and I’d give anything for this to just be a normal announcement of WEARESOEXCITEDANDSCAREDCANYOUBELIEVE IT?!! But it’s not and there’s not much we can do about this except take each day by the minute.
The pregnancy had signs of trouble for the past three weeks and we were already so guarded, but we still had hope. After all, I had morning sickness at night, I was so tired I couldn’t see straight, my boobs hurt and I woke up in the middle of the night to pee. A lot.
And I loved it all so much.
This afternoon I go in for a d&c. I will share more information when I can actually drink coffee and when I’m not prepping to go to the hospital, for now, this is all I can muster.
Right now, we are numb and wishing so much that this weren’t the case, but this happens and it happens a lot. We are going to be okay.
I am so very sorry. I do know how you feel and I wish I could ease some of the pain you are both feeling. But there are no words and no explanations that would do that…I know. Wishing you peace and strength, Sunny
I am so very sorry. I do know how you feel and I wish I could ease some of the pain you are both feeling. But there are no words and no explanations that would do that…I know. Wishing you peace and strength, Sunny
I’m very sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts.
I’m very sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts.
Thank you for sharing this with us. There are no words.
Oh, Beth. My heart is breaking for you. I am so, so sorry! Praying for you!
Damn. Just….damn.
I am sorry…..
I’m so sorry…
I am so sorry. Cyber hugs to you and your family.
I am so sorry. I just feel like I got the wind knocked out of me. You are such a beautiful person. Hugs to you.
I am so sorry Beth. This just sucks.
oh beth, i’m not sure what to say..i am so so very sorry. this must be so so hard. thinking and hurting for you.
lots and lots of hugs tonight.
I don’t know if you’re still planning to come this weekend, but know if you don’t that I would’ve wrapped you up in the biggest hug I could give and let you know that I do understand your loss. Profoundly.
Much love and prayers.
I’m new to your blog and just want to say I’m sorry about your loss. Don’t know what else to say…I hope you go through the sad times and be well soon.
(((Beth)))
So sorry, Beth. Your family is in my thoughts & prayers!
Oh, my heart is breaking for you! I’m so sorry.
i’m so sorry beth.
praying for you!
beth, as always, you are in my thoughts and prayers….
Oh Beth. I am so so so so sorry. ((hug))
Gosh, Beth. I’m so, so sorry
Saying a prayer for you all.
Beth, I am so, so sorry. {{{HUG}}}
Oh Beth. Oh, my heart is just broken for you. I’m wrapping you in prayer today. I am so tremendously sorry for your loss.
I’m so very sorry. Stay strong.
I’m so sorry for your loss…
I am here from Shrinking Jeans. I am so sorry to hear of your loss.
Take care.
Beth,
I am so sorry….
I’m so sorry. My heart goes out to you and your family. Take care of yourself, take time for yourself, and don’t let this keep you from adding to your family in the future.
Beth,
I am crying, my heart is racing, and I can’t think of anything else to say other than, “I’m so sorry.” Please know that I am thinking and praying for you and your entire family as you go through this. Please let me know if you need anything at all.
I am so sorry. You’re in my thoughts today.
Beth, I clearly remember all three of my pregnancies in the 1st week through the end and from the very moment I found out I was pregnant I bonded to the baby. He was very real to me. And so I know at 9 weeks you and this baby were one … I’m so deeply sorry for the pain and the loss of a child. Your child.
Nell
I’m so sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry. It’s such an awful thing to go through. Best of luck in recovering (physically AND mentally). And I’m sending more baby dust your way
Beth, I’m so so sorry. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
I am so very sorry for your loss. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
Oh Beth!
I don’t even know what to say. “I’m sorry” doesn’t feel like enough. Know we’re thinking of you and keeping you in our thoughts.
~ Annie
My heart is broken for you and all the loss you and your family have faced. Know that you are not alone in your thoughts and fears and that we are here for you if you need us.
Beth,
I know you don’t know me, but I came to your sight from Stephanie’s blog. Let me just tell you miscarriage sucks…it just flat out sucks! I had a miscarriage in July of 2007 and I 10 weeks at the time.
I am praying for you, and your healing. No matter how guarded you were, it still hurts. You make plans for that baby…and then in a second they were/are completely crushed! If you need or want someone to talk to who can relate just email me at brittanysears(at)hotmail(dot)com.
I truly mean it!
Oh, Beth. I’m so sorry. That feels inadequate. Sending you hugs and prayers.
Beth,
I am thinking of you and your family. I am so very sorry.
Oh Beth, the hits just keep on coming!
I have been out of touch and I gasped last night when I opened your page. I’m going to “ditto” what has already been said.
I am so sorry for your loss and I pray for a quick physical recovery – I know the emotional part will just take time.
Love, Laurie
I tried SO HARD to comment yesterday, but the site kept coming up with an error message.
I’m sooo sorry Beth. My heart hurts for you. If there is anything I can do, I know you don’t know me, but please don’t hesitate to say the word. *huge hugs*
My heart aches for you and your family. What a difficult thing to face. Lean on us as much as possible or needed. We (blogger buddies) are not going anywhere.
Oh Beth! Sorry doesn’t even come close to expressing my sadness for you and Brian. I’ve been away from the computer and didn’t get to see this post until this morning, but I saw your twitters yesterday and wondered what was going on. You will continue to be in my prayers and thoughts.
So sorry to hear this, Beth. I could not get your blog to load yesterday no matter how many times I refreshed by browser! I am so very sad to hear this news. You and your family are in my prayers. ((Hugs))
I am so sorry. I am crying for you sweetie. (((((((big hugs))))))
Oh sweet one,
I am so very sorry that you are facing this loss. I am sorry on so many levels — and know that no words really suffice. I want to hug you, let you lay in bed and bring you tea and take care of everything in your house for you!!
I know how excited you’ve been for this weekend. I know that you are really the only one who can make the decision in a way that will allow you to be content with. When I read your words though — I just want to sat to be easy on yourself. It IS OKAY not to go. Even if you were excited you don’t have to “buck up”. The hurt in your heart will still be there — and while that doesn’t mean you can’t go have fun if that is what you choose to do, but there is nothiing to feel badly about if you want to be home in bed iin hospital underwear
near your husband and family and every comfort home brings. Be easy on ourself. Be good to yourself. It is okay to slow down when you need to.
I am praying for you and will keep on. My heart aches for yours. I know this sounds silly from someone you don’t know IRL — but if there is anything I can do, anyway I can help, even just a specific way to pray — seriously, please just say the word.
And DON’T FOR A MOMENT feel guilty or badly for needing support or encouragement. That is what friends and peole who care for do — what they want to do — it would be more sad for all of your readers/friends to not have the opportunity to pour out love to one that they have come to care so much for.
Sending love and hugs your way. I am so sorry. With as awful and hurting as you feel now — you are right…there is still hope…although right now let yourself hurt, grieve, wrap up in your bed and in your familys love. Do whatever you need to do — and know there is support, care and love being sent towards you from all over the country.
Bless you.
Oh honey!
I’m so sorry.
Whatever you decide to do is the right decision. I want to meet you like mad but totally understand if you need to stay home. We will all love you and care for you if you come and if you stay we will love you as well!
Off to check on twitter to see if you made an announcement on there as to your decision.
I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t believe this has happened – it’s really not fair. You have a gift – truly a gift for writing and photography and being a wonderful mom and wife to your family. You should go on the trip because it will take your mind off of these tough times. You’re a good mom all the time so don’t feel bad about leaving, you’re friends and fellow bloggers will make you feel slightly better – I just know it. Mark 2009 with this trip and not the beginning of this sadness. The sadness will stay but the weekend opportunity will pass.
You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers.