So, I’m sick. I think I have a sinus infection, which is annoying because I was at the doctor’s office yesterday and thought it was just a cold but today I feel differently, like SIIIIIIICK, so now what?
Do I go back? When I feel like all I ever do is go to doctor’s appointments?
Tomorrow I have an ultrasound to find out “just how big this baby is.” I’m very nervous because I think he’s really big – which means a delivery before March 29th which, well, we were hoping to actually go full term this time around.
Except I’m so huge already that I’m almost always uncomfortable and out of breath. I feel totally and completely swollen and unattractive.
And I can’t sleep.
(also….sick….do not forget about that one.)
And then I was going through some old photos and I found this one and I can’t believe that it’s actually my family, taken 11 months before I was even pregnant with James and Jake and I can’t believe how much we’ve changed.
Obviously, the kids have gotten older and well, Brian and I have, too. But when I look at Brian and I, we look like babies. Babies who just don’t know much of anything. I sort of want to warn them “WATCH OUT…BE READY.” But we probably would not have listened because, well, that’s just what people do, they don’t listen because they just don’t really understand.
I see this photo and I think “yes, I’m sick, I’m massive with a huge baby and huge ankles and sausage fingers and I’m almost always sweaty but my God, there is this baby in my belly who is almost here and there is nothing more important than that.”
So, rather than warn all four of those people in that photo, instead I just want them to live just like they did, just how they knew how. And right now I’m going to do the same. Swollen fingers and all.
(and probably with a cookie in my hand and definitely a prayer in my heart.)