Okay, that’s a lie.  I do not drink decaf coffee, although, I would, because coffee is delicious.  By the way, I take mine with cream, regular cream, no sugar.  How do you take yours?

I can distinctly remember my Grandma giving me my first cup of coffee when I was young, she poured tons of half and half in it.  I can also remember her making me breakfast, she cut up bananas and poured half and half over the bananas in a bowl, that simple little breakfast remains one of my favorite things to eat.  Brings back such amazing memories of such a wonderful woman.  She died many years ago, somehow, it’s been, I don’t know, 17 years or so?  My God, how can that be?

Yesterday would have been her birthday.  I thought about her all day.  I even felt like her a little bit as I baked brownies and made a delicious dinner for my family.  (I’m serious, it was AMAZING.)

Anyway, back to coffee.  many of you have expressed concerns about my nursing and drinking coffee and also hearing my complaints about Elijah’s poor sleeping habits in the same breath.  I really appreciate your concern, honestly, I do, but I just don’t believe they are related because I don’t drink caffeine except for coffee in the mornings and one diet coke in the early afternoons.   Surrounding the coffee and diet coke, I drink about 120 ounces of water, every single day.  I’m sure it’s possible that the diet coke is getting through my breast milk just at the time of him going to bed at 8:30, but he goes right to sleep, we can’t even keep him awake past 8:30.  The trouble comes around 2:30 or 3, and then again at 4:30, and again at 5:45 and sometimes at 6:30.

But hey!  Last night I slept for three solid hours, I feel like a new (totally exhausted) woman!

And, tiny baby boy has a tooth!  A TOOTH!  Wha? How in the? What in the? He’s just a baby who was just born and now he has a tooth and plays in his exersaucer and cries when I leave the room?  Slow down time!  Slow down, sweet baby!

Last night, I laid next to him in bed, my room was dimly lit and I was watching him doze off.  Before he’d close his eyes, his eyes always met mine and he’d smile behind his pacifier.  He did this over and over again and since he can’t say words, I saw those smiles and heard the words “I just love you and my family so much” and then my heart melted, right there on the floor and I realized what a perfect fit he is in our family.  He just belongs.  He’s meant to be.

Today’s weather is sunny and crisp with blue skies and soft, billowy clouds.  I like today.  I like it a lot.