I just finished a bowl of cereal. My new favorite is Cinnamon Chex. It’s crazy good.
Oh and coffee, I’ve had two cups of coffee. Did I tell you I bought a Keurig? I am so in love with it. But I’m not in love with the cost of the K-cups. But it’s worth it. Eli is playing with his cars and talking to the stockings. He likes the way they touch his head when he stands underneath them. He ate a banana and two blueberry waffles today.
He’s a big boy.
Clara just put herself to sleep. Sometimes, I’m figuring out, she just wants to be left alone. “JUST STOP TOUCHING ME, STOP PUTTING YOUR BO0B IN MY MOUTH. GAH.”
At least, that’s what I think she says.
I’m sitting on my couch, using my laptop, while alone with a toddler and a newborn. I can count the number of times I’ve been able to do that since Clara was born.
And again today.
Clara and I were having a very difficult time with nursing. When she was born, she was a dream nurser. My milk came in quickly and easily, no engorgement (I think because I nursed Eli until I was five months pregnant?) She would just nurse on one side for five minutes, then five on the other and then we’d repeat. Sometimes, she’s fall asleep while nursing.
I love it when she falls asleep while nursing.
Then suddenly, a few weeks ago, things started going downhill with breastfeeding. She would begin to scream and fight. I thought it was supply. I took supplements, I would supplement her. I would switch positions at least seven times in one nursing session just to get her to latch. I’d lay down, stand up, walking around, swaddle her, undress her, switch rooms. I did everything to try to remedy our nursing situation.
I would give her a supplement of formula and sometimes she’s scream at that. And if she didn’t scream at that, she’d drink it slowly, cautiously. I dreaded nursing sessions.
I love nursing so this weighed on my heavily.
She had her two month appointment on Wednesday, I told the doctor that she would straighten her body, stiff like a board when I’d try to get her to latch but it was obvious she was ravenous. Often, when she would finally latch on, she’s struggle when letdown came and take a giant gulp and then cry so hard that it would break my heart. (and she would never latch back on after that.)
He said what I already knew. Reflux.
We gave her two doses of zantac on Wednesday and then yesterday? She nursed perfectly and peacefully 80% of the time. (which is an 80% improvement.)
And this? Me sitting, able to write, able to work, able to FINALLY have some time to myself because my sweet girl is finally comfortable, is an answered prayer.
I’m always skeptical with that diagnosis. Eli was diagnosed with it and I can’t say we saw much improvement despite two medications. But this time? Seeing her smiles and her coos and her delight while nursing? Brings me a sense of peace that I haven’t felt in a long, long time.
Maybe I won’t have to shut down my blog after all.
Happy Friday, friends!