I’m not even that picky about ice cream.  Give it to me straight up or on the rocks, in a waffle cone or in a bowl, covered in hot caramel?  Sign me up.

I think it’s something I’m passionate about, I think ice cream should be a part of everyone’s lives.  This Friday, I’m hosting a 31 Gifts Party (live in my area and want to come, email me!).  I’m having an ice cream bar.

Because THAT MAKES SENSE.

Anyway, this past week was really hard.  Nothing went right, I felt like I was constantly fighting with my kids and my husband.  My heart felt broken, my spirit; shattered.

And on Saturday, I didn’t have any ice cream.  For the first time in weeks.

I laid in bed, after crying into my pillow for a long time that night, thinking about how hard life is sometimes.  I realized I had gone ice cream-less all day.

I cried even harder.

{woe is me.  I know.}

While tears fell on my pillow, I prayed (begged) to God for grace the following day.  I asked Him to give me strength, to be a bigger person, to not always WANT, to GIVE more.  I also asked for a way for me to be ME again.  To be happy and in love, not just with my kids but also with my husband.  I asked Him to help me to be less angry but I also asked that my family GIVE more, too.  (it’s only fair.)

I can’t say everything is solved.  Because, my goodness, it’s not.  But the tears stopped and I’ve felt more happiness than I have in a long time.  And not just because of decisions and prayers on my end, but also decisions and prayers from those I live with, it’s a work in progress.

On Monday and Tuesday, I made up for it and had ice cream twice.  (I also felt and saw a whole lot of love and smiles, too.)

Last week, Stephanie, Lovelyn, Rhonda and I all met for ice cream at a local parlor.  Our kids were so hyper and honestly, driving us crazy.  And then Gray fell and lost his ice cream.  He was so sad.  But he sat down and continued to eat his chocolate waffle cone despite the tears and the sadness.  This little four year old taught me a serious lesson.

Some moments are bad, some are good, either way, things are better with ice cream.

***

This week, I lost 1.6 pounds.

Back to picking outfits for the day when I love the way I look, I’ve decided to go with beachwear this week.  This is me.

I like it.

I called my sister and told her.   We realized how much sense it made since I was with her the weekend before and I actually took a nap.  Back then I never napped.

I was going to wait to tell my Mom.  I sat down later that evening and figured out the due date and sure enough, the due date was July 20th, 2008.

Her birthday.

I knew I simply had to tell her.  I picked up the phone and told her.  This is just one more reason why James and Jake are so incredibly special.

Last year on her birthday, we told her I was pregnant with Elijah.  (we had just found out the day before.)

She opened her card, read and then cried, saying that was what she wished for.

Fast forward to this year, TODAY, her birthday, Elijah is here and she’s so in love with him.

While we were in the hospital after he was born and those first few weeks when all he did was cry, my Mom was always there, helping, in any way she could.

We are so grateful for that and for her.

Please head over to my Mom’s blog and wish her a very, very Happy Birthday!  I would love to flood her with wishes for a beautiful day!

My Mom and Eli – March 30, 2010

We love you, Mom!  We are so happy to be celebrating you today!

Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more.
If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.
–Oprah Winfrey

I’m grateful for the summer food on our table.

My kids.  Their hearts are so full of life that it rubs off on us.

I’m thankful for summer shoes on clearance at Target in July.

Not pictured: prayer at church, peanut butter ice cream cones at our local ice cream parlor, kid-sized swimming pools, neighbors who can bake, family car rides in the country, a clean bedroom, sitting on the floor with the kids, tickle parties and a husband who gets it.

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. -William Arthur Ward

I spent lots of time with friends this weekend.  Stephanie, in particular.  Our families together just happen to mesh so well.  I remember when I met her a few years ago, we were at Panera and she was talking about her boys – she was a perfect stranger to me then and then our worlds continued to collide and I think our kids are the best friends.  I think they think they are, too.

Yesterday morning I had a short photo shoot with Stephanie and then another with Erin after that.  It was HOT outside.  I can’t wait to show you some photos, it was lots of fun.  On the way home from their shoots, I was watching the scenery.  I’m a sucker for summers in Northwest Indiana.  So beautiful – the simple cornfields are so familiar to me.  The smell of dirt, corn, sweat and lake all mixed together to create this wonderful aroma.

I was wishing my brothers could be in the area on this Fourth of July, like last year.  But it’s not to be.  I’m so thankful for their service to our country, I’m thankful everyday, but yesterday, my pride was extra deep.  My Mom wrote about what it’s like to have two Majors as sons in the military.  It’s an awesome post.

Eli slept until seven this morning, then he nursed, I put him back down at 7:30 and we slept until nine which means OHMYGODHEISSOOLD.  Just today he starting reaching out for things.  Dear Time, SLOW DOWN.

Right?

Tonight I have a photo shoot with one of my twitter friends.  She lives in Chicago, she’s 37 weeks pregnant with her first and I am so excited for her to become a Mama.   I love photographing pregnant moms and also those first moments when they became a Mom.

Isn’t it hard to believe that Tommy was born nearly one year ago?

Dear Time, SLOW DOWN.

Seriously.

1.  Last year at this time, I was not pregnant but desperately wanted to be and Sarah was about 14 weeks pregnant.

TIME FLIES.

2.  Why didn’t we try this 15 minutes earlier when Eli wasn’t so unbelievably tired?

and

three.

This is the first photo shoot of many, they’re going to be together for the rest of their lives.

Sarah and I are pretty excited.  I can’t say the same about the boys just yet.

(Trey, six months old, is on the left.  Eli, nearly three months old, is on the right.)

On Tuesday, a package arrived, in it were costumes for the kids.  To say they were excited would be a total understatement.  They wore the costumes while they watched TV, played Guitar Hero, watched over their brother and ate lunch.  So the idea of wearing them to the Disney Store in Chicago nearly kept them awake the entire night before.

We honestly had no idea what to expect.  We arrived to see a very long line.  Disney was offering a limited edition Jessie doll, only 2010 were created.  Fans arrived early to purchase their dolls and have them signed by Joan Cusack, the voice of Jessie.

Fortunately, we were able to walk past the line to the media area, where we were allowed to join the media frenzy that surrounded Joan.  IT. WAS. FUN.  Anna and Noah were being interviewed by TV and radio stations.  They really did not understand what was going on, honestly, neither did I, I just felt so lucky to be there.

Needless to say, we met Joan and she was amazing.

After talking with Anna and Noah, she offered to buy them whatever they wanted from the store.  Her two sons helped the kids shop, her sons were the nicest boys.

I was wearing Eli in my sling, Joan approached me and said “I want to hold him.”  I said “NO WAY, HE’S MINE, BACK OFF.”

Okay, that’s a lie, I said “You do?!  Okay then!”  And she held him in her arms and seemed to really be loving him.  I was like “can I get my picture taken with you?”  and she said something like “uh uh, sure kid, whatever you say.”

“CHEEEEESE!”  I said.

“You’re such a cute little baby,” she said.

She was smitten.  (how could you not be?!)

You get the idea, we met Joan, she was awesome, Anna is in AWE of her, we can’t wait to see Toy Story 3 and now I have a giveaway for you!

Our friends at Disney are offering up a fun Jessie prize package -

One lucky reader will receive A Jessie Talking Doll, Jessie Backpack, Jessie Lunch tote & a Jessie Journal! ($67 value)  This is bound to make one Jessie fan very happy.  Anna picked out a Jessie doll and loves her, Jessie has been to WalMart, Target, the park and Anna wears her around in a sling.  (she also sleeps by her bed in a bed she made of tissues.  It’s all about hospitality in my house.)

What do you need to do to enter to win?  3 ways to enter:

-Leave me a comment telling me who your favorite Toy Story character is!

-Tweet about this giveaway, leave your link to your tweet in a separate comment.

-Blog or Facebook about this giveaway, leaving your link in a separate comment!

That’s it!  This giveaway will close on Friday, June 25th at 9:00 CST, winner to be announced this weekend.

Good luck!

Thanks to Disney for this great giveaway and for giving my family the opportunity to meet Joan Cusack!

I really mean that.  I have stopped wishing away the newborn phase (yes, I did, I admit it.) but now, oh my gosh, he is just such a treasure.  I am so excited to watch him grow up but for now I’ll take exactly what he has to offer us, which is Elijah being Elijah, at this moment.

I  can remember coming here when he was just two weeks old to tell you guys what a difficult baby he was – and he was.  SO HARD.  I was scared to come to you  because I didn’t want you to think that I was complaining about this amazing blessing in our lives, something we had hoped and prayed for for so long and here I was – COMPLAINING.

Your response was nothing short of the best thing I could have heard.  Words of support flooded my comments and my inbox, I felt so loved and mostly I felt not alone.

So, it only makes sense that I come to you and tell you the good things, things have changed drastically since that moment nine weeks ago.

-HE SLEEPS!  Not much during the day, just cat naps but that’s okay because when we are awake we can watch his amazing self when he is awake.

-He doesn’t cry as much as more.  When he was diagnosed with reflux (four weeks ago?) I was totally skeptical.  But there is now no doubt that this poor baby was just so uncomfortable.  My only regret was that I didn’t have him checked for it sooner.

-Nursing is so much better.  I plan to write an entire post, series, BOOK! (totally kidding – NO BOOK) about my nursing experience with Elijah thus far.  Although our nursing relationship is not perfect, it’s GOOD and that’s all I want.  On Sunday, for the first time in nine weeks, I didn’t have to give him a supplement!  (yesterday, I did, twice- but that’s okay!)  I’m thinking it’s a little like pushing a baby out, you get to a certain point and the baby goes back in, you push again, the baby moves, you stop pushing and he goes back in until FINALLY you get the baby over that hump and woooosh, the rest is BETTER.

-His eyes.  His eyes are some of the most captivating things I have ever seen.  I love looking into my kids’ eyes, I love that they just know to look into YOUR eyes when speaking, there’s no discomfort, it’s just the natural thing to do.  Eli’s eyes make it difficult for me to get anything done.  He just stares into my soul, it’s like we are conversing through our eyes with no words, the entire time my heart beating quickly because the beauty is overwhelming.  And he watches me so closely, everywhere I go, he hears my voice and he looks for me.  I am his Mama.  And he knows it.

-Back to sleeping, our nights are becoming nothing short of pretty awesome.  He typically goes to sleep at ten, if he can hold out that long and sleeps until four.  This morning he woke up at 4:30, he ate, I laid him down at 5:40 and then we slept until 8:25.  That, my friends, is heaven.

Speaking of heaven, I am missing James and Jake.  Watching Eli grow is bittersweet and I am reminded of what we don’t get to see with James and Jake.  However, James and Jake help me remember how BLESSED we are to have this family.  Every single one of us helps to create our own little heaven on earth.

It’s powerful.  And painfully beautiful.

I’m kidding!  I would never do that.

Or would I?

We hoped and prayed that everything would be safe, that our baby would be healthy.

I’m so thankful we had that hope.

Because he is more amazing than we could have ever dreamed.

{images from Eli’s first photo shoot with Mama, he is such a good little model, don’t you think?}