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Friday Morning Coffee

June 4th, 2010

I’ve got my raisin bran and my coffee. My coffee is much needed today, I am so sleepy. Elijah has been sleeping pretty well (PLEASEDON’TJINXIT.) Today he slept until five after I laid him down at ten last night. The day before I laid him down at ten and he slept until six!

Today, I nursed him and laid him back down at six and then I laid down and fell asleep HARD CORE. He woke up at seven crying his tiny little head off. I still can’t figure out why. I’m thinking maybe a belly ache? I nursed him and that relaxed him and then he had two explosions in his diaper.

We have been putting him in this new chair (new for him) and he loves it. That’s how I’m able to write right now. He stares at it likes it’s an alien and then he kicks his legs like crazy. It’s unbelievably adorable. I already feel like he’s growing up too quickly.

Today is the first day of summer vacation. I feel like I should feel like a bad Mom because right now Noah is playing Wii and Anna is on the computer and it’s only 8:38 in the morning. But I don’t actually feel like a bad Mom because I know once they make their beds and brush their teeth, they’ll go outside and play all day long.

Anna has a birthday party today at the neighbor’s house. They have a pool and water scares me. I’ve made plans with Stephanie, we are taking our kids on a picnic and a walk while Anna’s at the party, I’m so nervous leaving her there. (she can’t swim)

Brian tells me I need to loosen my strings a little, that I bring so much stress on myself just with worry. I can’t help it, I get it from my Mom.

So far today, Anna has asked me at least 25 questions and she’s been awake for 70 minutes. That’s a lot of questions to ask someone who doesn’t have a lot of patience today. We bought her a new bathing suit and face mask last night. She wants to put them on right now for a party that’s in three hours. I’m tempted to let her just for the sake of peace.

Don’t you hate it when you don’t have patience? It’s like you know you don’t have patience, you know you don’t like not having patience but you just don’t know how to get the patience.

Anna keeps talking to me about the party, like right now, as I type. She’s trying on her bathing suit right now. I just gave her permission to keep it on for awhile, for the sake of peace. Eli is getting fussy and now I’m wondering how I’m going to get through the day without any patience.

I mean, I know I’ll get through it, but I’d like to do it somewhat gracefully, you know? So far? That’s not happening.

ANYWAY, this weekend is the first weekend in a really long time without any plans. I hope it stays that way. We plan to start the weekend out by cleaning the house tomorrow morning. I have this deep desire to make my house lighter, to fill up bags for Goodwill and give stuff away via Freecycle and also to throw things away. We have too much stuff.

I feel like I’ve tortured you with my ramblings.

By the way, this piece of crap post took me over two three hours to write.

I need some tylenol.

I hope your weekend is better than this post.

Not Perfect

December 7th, 2009

I only have a few minutes before I start the craziness of this day but I just wanted to stop in and let you all know that I am NOT PERFECT.

I’m so far from perfect that it’s hysterical and yet, sometimes, after I write a post to all of you, I think “gosh, I sound so…’on’ all of the time.”

The truth is, I’m not always positive, I’m sometimes grouchy, I always procrastinate, I sleep too much, I eat too much, I don’t eat my veggies, I sometimes go to bed angry, Brian and I do argue, he sometimes IS right (shhhhh….), I don’t hug my kids enough and I’m terrible with money.

Remember on Friday when I was like “hey, this weekend I’m going to show you a handmade project that ANYONE can do?“ Well, guess what? I did it on Saturday and SCREWED IT UP. No lie. So…there’s that, too. (don’t worry, it’s still coming to you, just with better instructions than what I received.)

*phew* I feel better.

Also? I never say “phew.”

The thing is…I KNOW that you guys don’t care. My husband doesn’t care, my kids don’t care, my friends don’t care…so why do I?

I don’t know…but I’m working on it.

s.l.o.w.l.y …

I’ll begin working on it as soon as I finish this bowl of cocoa puffs as I sit on the couch with laundry just SITTING in my dryer.

Then I’m off to my son’s school because he forgot his lunchbox in the car. {he’s not perfect either!}

Good substitution

November 10th, 2009

We had big plans last week to have both sets of grandparents over for a feast of food that could only be eaten with our fingers. (fun idea? I think so.) On the menu? Barbecue ribs, roasted red potatoes, cheesy garlic bread, chips and homemade guacamole, fresh veggies and dip and peanut butter cupcakes.

BUT THEN…

we got sick. And we didn’t want to expose the beloved grandparents to this horrid flu, so we decided to make the meal a little bit more simple.

So, we ordered pizza and luckily I made the guacamole (easy recipe below) before the GREAT FLU FEST OF 2009 overtook our cozy home. Although it wasn’t quite the feast we had prepared, it was still delicious (hello? IT’S PIZZA!) and we had fun. We sat in the living room using just paper towels as our plates and we played Uno and Zingo and read (a ton of) books.

It was perfect. In it’s own special, very mucous-y, yet delicious way.

pizza eater

Because I’m all about the sharing, here is this recipe for fresh guacamole…IT IS YUM.

3 very ripe avacados
3 roma tomatoes (gently core inside, then dice)
1 large lime
red onion (use about a 1/4 of a cup, when not pregnant, I love it and I dice it up real nice, when I’m pregnant, OHMYGOD it’s evil and shall not even enter my home)
1 hot pepper (or jalapeno pepper) slice and dice as much as you wish. The more you use, the kickier the guac.
Green onions (finely chopped…again, add as much as you’d like, I typically add 1/2 cup)
2 garlic gloves
1/2 a bunch of cilantro (finally chopped)
salt and pepper to taste

Mix together and dip your chips. Enjoy!

This post was sponsored by Viva Towels. For fun, fork-free recipes – including videos – and snappy entertaining ideas, get over to the VIVA® Diva Café.

Now

September 25th, 2009

Right now I’m sitting on my couch, I just ate a bowl of Cinnamon Life and I’m drinking coffee. Yes, even though I’m pregnant, I still drink coffee in the mornings.

I have to clean my whole house by 11:00 today because I asked my cleaning lady to come back after having to say goodbye to her in an effort to save money before summer started.

Yes, I clean my house before my cleaning lady comes…it makes sense. Yes it does. She can’t clean my bathtub if it’s full of clothes. Not that mine is full of clothes. *cough*

On my way to dropping the kids off at school today, I plugged in my iPhone to the audio system in the car and played a song that I had in my mind and I really listened to the words and it nearly brought me to my knees with it’s lyrics. It was my life. It is my life. I finished the song and felt refreshed and not alone and Anna said “will you play that song again?”

I wonder if she had the same experience, although, probably, hopefully, not as heavy.

Tomorrow, Brian and I are heading to our favorite little town in Indiana to spend four days with my sister and her husband. This is the eighth year that we have done this trip and it just gets better and better.

No kids. No responsibilities. No cooking. No laundry. Just ice cream. Pizza. Shopping. And for the husbands: beer and golf. We share a condo…it’s literally BLISS.

I’ve been more emotional about things this week than I have been throughout this entire pregnancy. Not that I sit around crying all of the time, although I did while watching flash mobs on You Tube yesterday, it’s just that I’m feeling things more deeply than I have been. It’s possible I’m feeling again because I’ve cut back on my prozac significantly. I always felt that prozac was like a concrete barrier that prevented me from ever going to “that place.” It’s like a great protector…but also, sometimes that place needs to be visited.

I took Noah to the dentist on Wednesday, somehow, the conversation with the hygienist led to losing James and Jake, which is so strange because it’s not something I bring up with people I don’t know, but it couldn’t be prevented. So, I shared. I’m glad I did. She asked me questions, real questions, it was a good moment. To recognize their place in our lives feels good.

It’s interesting to me that two little boys who were so small and who were here for such a small portion of time, can impact us FOREVER and SO DEEPLY.

I am so grateful for them.

I probably won’t be around much until maybe Tuesday or Wednesday, but I’ll try to pop in when I can. My sister, Sarah, is 28 weeks pregnant and she and I are doing a maternity shoot for her, so maybe I’ll come by and show you how wonderfully cute she is.

She is so cute.

I’m off to begin my day…THIS DAY that is so remarkable and beautiful, I’ll be sure to live it because that’s what it’s here for…I’m hoping you do the same.

Moving on.

September 7th, 2009

I’m pretty sure this is the longest I have gone without writing. At least in a long, long time. It’s like I forgot I even had a blog. We were gone all day long every single day and then we would get home late, put the kids to bed, watch Brian exercise and be so tired I could barely make it up the stairs.

One night, I even stayed up until 12:24 IN THE MORNING.

I know.

My life, oh this crazy life of ours, will hopefully be returning to normal tomorrow. So much happened this weekend beyond the funeral, (which was perfect, thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers), so much good but also so many bad, negative things that make my heart hurt. Things I can not speak of here because it’s not mine to tell. It’s just not good.

Today felt lighter and brighter, despite the rest of my family heading back to their home all over the United States. I miss my brothers and sisters and their wives and husbands and kids so much. I hate living so far away from them. This afternoon, I took a beautiful nap, I was so tired and slept so hard.

Pregnancy, death, drama, trauma, it’s all so exhausting.

So, tomorrow we return to the mounds and mounds of laundry, school lunches, grocery shopping, homework, school forms that we are endlessly filling out and regular life…I’m ready for it. I am so ready for it.

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Archive for That’s Life – Page 2

Friday Morning Coffee

Not Perfect

Good substitution

Now

Moving on.

Geek Speak